So rarely is a holiday movie made that doesn't hit you over the head with holiday cheer.While those movies are great, they are often so unrealistic, they just make you more depressed than you already are over the holidays.
Love Actually is one of my favorites just for this reason -- it is dark, at some times even painful, much like the holidays themselves. There are a few scenes that I absolutely adore...the one where Laura Linney is so excited to bring her crush home, only to really be crushed shortly after when her priorites get screwy. And also, the one that really gets me, is the scene where Emma Thompson realizes her hubby is cheating on her. She is visibly shaken, and trying to keep up the brave fight in front of her children, so she escapes to her room to heave the cry that only a broken heart can cause.
But yet, amidst all the saddness, there is a bit of light. A hidden bit of perfection.
15 December 2008
14 December 2008
Fighting the Good Fight
Lately I have been thinking a lot of regret. My goal has always been not to regret that which I have done in life...after all, if I've tried it, I can only learn from it, right? I have made mistakes, for sure, and made some very poor decisions, but I can't say I really regret them. How do we learn if not for mistakes, for trying new things? Often things that could be regrettable, like, for me, not staying longer in college along with my friends, end up happening for the better, in this case, it allowed me to go live in Spain and travel and figure out who I am. So really...regret has no real use, right?
But then I read this, by David Eggers (from How the Water Feels to Fishes)
I think I have mentioned this before, but the last 6 months or so have been a little strange...full of reminders of the brevity of life. These events have really made me re-evaluate my actions, my attitude towards this crazy life. They have also brought to my mind the fights I didn't fight, and made me think of impending fights that should be battled. These are the fights that could end in something beautiful, something fantastic. They could also end in great explosions and failure.
But if I never take up the fight, how will I know which are those that end in the fantastic?
But then I read this, by David Eggers (from How the Water Feels to Fishes)
The Fights Not Fought
She could not remember where she ate dinner the night before, or whom she had met last week in that walnut-paneled room. She could not recall the names of the streets where she once lived, or the date of her own father's birthday. But she could remember the fights she did not fight. There were so many, and they haunted her with a stabbing, shaming pain. People had told her to choose her battles, and she had chosen some, and neglected others, and now the neglected came to her like an army of lost children. She should have chosen them all, she thought to herself, as she buried another friend. She should have chosen every one.
I think I have mentioned this before, but the last 6 months or so have been a little strange...full of reminders of the brevity of life. These events have really made me re-evaluate my actions, my attitude towards this crazy life. They have also brought to my mind the fights I didn't fight, and made me think of impending fights that should be battled. These are the fights that could end in something beautiful, something fantastic. They could also end in great explosions and failure.
But if I never take up the fight, how will I know which are those that end in the fantastic?
03 December 2008
02 December 2008
The Days of Mixed Tapes
Back in the 80's and 90's, making mixed tapes was an important past time. I can't count how many I have in my parent's garage (though my mom probably knows, as she asks me to get rid of them almost every time I go home...sorry Mom!), most of them taped from the radio. When I got a new stereo and a CD player, I graduated to making tapes of songs from the CDs I owned...probably a little Janet Jackson mixed with some Trash Can Sinatras or something.
But the ultimate validation came when someone finally made ME a mixed tape. Making a mixed tape was not something to be taken lightly; songs were carefully chosen to set a mood, convey a feeling, introduce someone to something they wouldn't otherwise listen to. To me, getting a mixed tape made me feel so special. Seems silly now, but back then...
The first mixed tape I ever got was from my friend Howser (well, his name was Doug, which we changed to Doogie, which I changed to Howser, as in, M.D. He humored me). I think I hadstolen borrowed a tape from him, which had an odd mix but I just loved. He decided it was time I listen to better music, which to him, was punk. So he made me a tape called "Intro to Punk," which had a variety of covers on the "fun" side and awesome music on the "serious" side.
I loved that tape.
We sat together and listened to it, him explaining the various bands to me, making me listen to the words...all the words. When we'd see a poster for a show, he'd point it out and we'd go. I must say...it was much easier to have someone tell me what to listen to!
That tape got me through college and then some. I am surprised I didn't wear it out. When I was having trouble with my lacrosse coach, I would put it in the Walkman, go to the Wall, and throw the shit out of the ball to the rhythm of Samiam's "Bad Day" or "United Cigar" by Good Riddance. They had the perfect anger rhythm, and I got super strong...too bad my coach hated me and still wouldn't play me (um...not bitter or anything).
Somewhere along the line, the actual tape got lost. But not too long ago I found the tape case with all the songs listed, and have been able to download a lot of them. I've been listening to them lately, which causes me to look crazy walking down the street, whipping my head around to the beat. It also makes me want to be back in Yosemite 35K dissecting every part of every song. Oh, and it makes me want to go play some lax, too!!
But the ultimate validation came when someone finally made ME a mixed tape. Making a mixed tape was not something to be taken lightly; songs were carefully chosen to set a mood, convey a feeling, introduce someone to something they wouldn't otherwise listen to. To me, getting a mixed tape made me feel so special. Seems silly now, but back then...
The first mixed tape I ever got was from my friend Howser (well, his name was Doug, which we changed to Doogie, which I changed to Howser, as in, M.D. He humored me). I think I had
I loved that tape.
We sat together and listened to it, him explaining the various bands to me, making me listen to the words...all the words. When we'd see a poster for a show, he'd point it out and we'd go. I must say...it was much easier to have someone tell me what to listen to!
That tape got me through college and then some. I am surprised I didn't wear it out. When I was having trouble with my lacrosse coach, I would put it in the Walkman, go to the Wall, and throw the shit out of the ball to the rhythm of Samiam's "Bad Day" or "United Cigar" by Good Riddance. They had the perfect anger rhythm, and I got super strong...too bad my coach hated me and still wouldn't play me (um...not bitter or anything).
Somewhere along the line, the actual tape got lost. But not too long ago I found the tape case with all the songs listed, and have been able to download a lot of them. I've been listening to them lately, which causes me to look crazy walking down the street, whipping my head around to the beat. It also makes me want to be back in Yosemite 35K dissecting every part of every song. Oh, and it makes me want to go play some lax, too!!
01 December 2008
2 Minute Rule
Most people who know me know I am not the neatest person on the planet. I may try, but my surroundings are usually filled with piles of paperwork, clothes, shoes...all stuff that I could easily put away and just don't.
Recently, I was at lunch with a few coworkers, and we were talking about a class we had all taken together. At the end, we had to write ourselves a note, reminding us of a change we committed to making for 30 days at work. Mine had something to do with finding creative solutions before just saying no. My coworker's was the 2 minute rule -- don't put off something you can easily do within 2 minutes.
Interesting approach, I thought, and decided to apply it to my housekeeping. It only takes a minute to make my bed, to hang up my jacket, put my shoes in my closet...and it has totally changing the way my place looks! It looks so much better, neater, and I don't get so frustrated!
I am not perfect. It is easy to put it off, and sometimes I do. But it has totally changed the way I think about things. I love it!
Recently, I was at lunch with a few coworkers, and we were talking about a class we had all taken together. At the end, we had to write ourselves a note, reminding us of a change we committed to making for 30 days at work. Mine had something to do with finding creative solutions before just saying no. My coworker's was the 2 minute rule -- don't put off something you can easily do within 2 minutes.
Interesting approach, I thought, and decided to apply it to my housekeeping. It only takes a minute to make my bed, to hang up my jacket, put my shoes in my closet...and it has totally changing the way my place looks! It looks so much better, neater, and I don't get so frustrated!
I am not perfect. It is easy to put it off, and sometimes I do. But it has totally changed the way I think about things. I love it!
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